Waterloo Problems

Dear World,

Today, I want to shed light on a serious issue. If you know anything about the University of Waterloo, it is probably about the hardcore Math and Engineering programs and, of course that it is a top-notch institution (Warrior Pride!). But, what most people don’t know is the presence of this sinister creature on campus. I’m talking about the GEESE! They are everyyyyywheeerrrreeee. And, I’m not exaggerating. They even have a Twitter account, @uwgeese.

Chillin' like a boss. Photo Credit: Nafis Karim

Be it winter, spring, summer, or fall, they are always present. It’s not their presence which makes them evil, it is their size and viciousness. The height of an average goose will probably be around the knees of a person, and that is pretty big for a bird; especially when they spread their wings! They have known to be extra vicious during their breeding season. Around that time they hiss at people passing by and I have also heard of the geese “attacking” people. Scary stuff.

In first year, I lived in residence on campus, and, even though, I was on the first floor, I could hear the geese! It’s not a sound you want to hear when you are asleep, it is painful. On a scale of zero to 8:30 AM classes, morning classes being the most annoying, the geese were right next to the classes. I remember near the end of that year, there were signs all over campus that warned students to be careful because it was their breeding season. And, last year, they set up a nest on top of the entrance to the Environment building and the entrance had to be sealed off due to the geese’s malicious behaviour! So, this year they had to install a net in that same area to prevent the geese from nesting there again. Oh, geese.

I have had my fair share of geese interactions which have included running away or taking the long route to get to class in order to avoid the geese. And, if I’m not avoiding the geese, I’m avoiding stepping in their (for lack of a better word) poop. So much poop…

And every year, there is always a first year kid in the fall term trying to capture a goose in a laundry basket. My advice? Don’t be that kid. It is always first year students in their first terms at university, because they are fascinated by the geese and think it is going to be fun, and by winter term they realize it’s just not worth it.

At the end of the day, the geese and the students have a love-hate relationship. We don’t like the geese but they are our unofficial mascots! And thanks to the geese, you’ll learn an important lesson, if you ever have the urge to breed geese, you’ll remember your days at Waterloo and decide against it! :) And, in all honesty, next term is my last at UW and I admit that I’ll miss the geese and their drama (insert moment of sadness).

Until we meet again, take care and tread carefully,

F.

P.s. Just saw this on the Daily Bulletin!

Angry Birds
Reports have been coming in of aggressive geese on campus. Seriously, the birds are bitey this time of year. Plant Operations will be erecting the usual barricades around nesting sites that are close to areas of human traffic on campus.The university’s safety office has recommended a warning leaflet prepared by the Ohio state government that outlines how to avoid getting on a goose’s bad side.
Source: Daily Bulletin

9 comments
  1. S Haq said:

    There are two geese (I’m guessing man and wife) outside of Wessley Court North that have claimed the ground. It has got so bad that even the UW Police is getting involved. More power to the geese!!

    • Sometimes, I feel the geese “run tingz” in Waterloo.

  2. Did you see the youtube video about the geese hostage situation? http://www.youtube.com/watch?feature=player_embedded&v=jHfN-hzzlS8

    • Haha, yeah I did and the article on Weather Network, it was hilarious! :D

  3. Nafis said:

    Hi Fatima,
    Nice post! just wanted to tell you though, the summer time is when the geese all breed. So roughly for every 2 geese, there will be 6 more. The goslings are cute for the first week so enjoy them waddling around :)
    -From Nafishasavoice.wordpress.com

    • Hey Nafis,

      Thanks a lot!

      Haha I will keep an eye out for them! :)

  4. Fahad Ali said:

    hahahahaha…..Something different to write on….Nice…..

    • haha thanks!

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